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A Self-Kindness Permission Slip to REST

Why so many reminders on this site to practice slower living, carve out moments for stillness, and rest more as you are able? Your interiors, both literal and figurative really do matter. Self-kindness doesn’t just benefit you. Hustling takes a toll on the collective as well. This could easily become a politically-charged rant about capitalism, but don’t we consume our fair share elsewhere? I’ll keep things personal and confessional as a work in progress.

Hello Lovely's modern European country living room with linen club chair, white oak flooring and French stone fireplace. #modernfrench #modernbelgian

Rest, Healing and Self-Kindness

Too often I equate my need for rest with weakness and sloth and measure my worth according to productivity.

Modern European country cottage bedroom with Stikwood (Hamptons, white) accent wall - Hello Lovely Studio. #moderncountry #modernfrench

Where do fears about slow and steady living originate anyway? Who am I competing with…my younger self? Could my choices become more empowering choices?

Hello Lovely Studio's renovated modern rustic foyer with knotty alder door and antique dropleaf table. #modernrustic

Few answers here. To be clear-headed enough to even entertain them, this girl needs a good night’s rest and a relatively settled nervous system!

Belgian style minimal modern rustic living room with white oak hardwood floors - Hello Lovely Studio.

I don’t know what your sleepless judgment looks like, but mine can be emotionally weird and negative.

Belgian style minimal modern rustic dining room with agave succulent in pot on white farm table - Hello Lovely Studio.
Find this beautiful succulent HERE.

I’m a better instrument of peace and channel for grace with sufficient REM. Restfulness allows my heart’s posture to stay soft and open.

Slowing the Pace

A slower pace is healthier. If I’m rushing or even multi-tasking (rarely wise), adrenaline is released into the bloodstream, and my body goes into fight or flight.

Belgian style minimal modern rustic living room with white oak hardwood floors - Hello Lovely Studio.

I need more rest at this age, but I’m often in denial, comparing my output to what I could accomplish decades ago.

Belgian modern minimal open floor plan with white oak hardwood flooring and Belgian linen upholstered furniture - Hello Lovely Studio.

How many years did I feel fierce about an ability to save the world daily? Fully in my head, I couldn’t see the value of self-compassion or kind self-talk. (Psst. Cells in your body are listening to every unkind word.)

Belgian modern European country living room with pale upholstery and neutral accents - Hello Lovely Studio.

Saving the world today looks like stillness and prayer.

Belgian linen upholstered egg chair and slope arm sofa (RH) with white oak hardwoods in Hello Lovely's living room.

Right where I am, I’m untethering from old narratives about not accomplishing enough in my work, relationships, community, and wellness.

Personal growth quote about stillness by Michele of Hello Lovely Studio. #personalgrowthquotes #spiritualgrowthquotes

If I’m having a good day as far as autoimmune issues, if my joints and gut feel pretty darn good, shouldn’t I do all the things?

Benjamin Moore White OC-151 on walls, trim, and ceiling of Hello Lovely's living room and entry.

The old me took the gift of a good health day and spent it on work or physically demanding tasks. Instead of abundance and gratitude, a sense of scarcity would surface. After all, I reasoned it could be a long stretch for this level of ease to return.

White oak hardwood flooring and antique French prayer chair in Hello Lovely's modern rustic European country entry.

Thank goodness I’m changing. Absence of pain…a calm from the storm…need not always require deep sacrifice. I can enjoy the reprieve without milking it for everything it offers.

Benjamin Moore White OC-151 on walls, trim, and ceiling in Hello Lovely's modern Belgian dining room.

It’s okay to sink into a settled posture. Worries of “it won’t get done” can be quieted.

Self-compassion and slow living quote about rest and recovery from Michele of Hello Lovely Studio. #selfcompassion
Benjamin Moore White OC-151 in Belgian modern European country vaulted great room with rustic sideboard - Hello Lovely Studio.

What if I get cozy with such ease and welcome radical receptivity to grow? I’m experimenting. Experimentation is not the same as faking it.

Modern European country dining room and living room with rustic wood shelves and Belgian linen - Hello Lovely Studio.

While I have some theatrical background, I’m still hopeless faking it because it can feel like a strategy to control and manipulate, and I long for the authentic.

Belgian linen slipcovered dining chairs with round table in modern European country dining room - Hello Lovely Studio.

Even the idea of do it while afraid (which is not faking and used to fit) is less enticing. Dismantling fear and growing in faith are calling.

Tricia Hersey quote about rest and productivity on Hello Lovely Studio - @thenapministry. #triciahersey

I’m only now learning how emotions are physical sensations in the body and not mental experiences. It’s probably no coincidence that my body struggles to metabolize both emotions AND food.

French doors between breakfast room and dining room in Hello Lovely's modern European country renovated home.

Our culture reinforces us to manage grief and anxiety cognitively. I’m a trained psychotherapist…what progress is possible when sessions are not exclusively devoted to wound excavation and include time for spiritual direction and a restorative nap?

Hello Lovely's kitchen table with French white pot of white roses. #modernfrench #whitefarmtable

Rest is essential for cleansing the brain and cellular health, and since the body holds emotion, why not acknowledge the healing advantage of organic sleep therapy?

BM White OC-151 on walls in minimal modern rustic dining room with white harvest table and agave in pot - Hello Lovely Studio. #benjaminmoorewhiteoc151
BM White OC-151 on walls, trim, ceiling

I know many of you learned this stuff long ago and hardly need my reminders. Baby steps for this late bloomer. Find me on the prairie: pacing myself, feeling less guilt, and making little dents in a slew of projects that remain unfinished. Also find me sleeping seven hours straight after two years of steady deprivation.

Can I keep sleeping when I return to the desert?

Wing of airplane in blue sky - Hello Lovely Studio.

Mountain medicine will work magic I’m sure.

Clouds, blue sky, and ice from airplane - Hello Lovely Studio.

The to-do list will shorten so more restful healing can be built into the days.

Glennon Doyle FEMINIST quote from Elise Loehnen's ON OUR BEST BEHAVIOR: The Seven Deadly Sins and The Price Women Pay to Be Good.

Restful healing?

Rustic European country entry with knotty alder front door and neutrals - Hello Lovely Studio. #modernfrench #frenchfarmhouse

I’ll walk distances and pray every single day. Walking can be meditative, and when you start praying for the world, the prayer stretches wide. I’ll read and write about joy and suffering.

10 Smart Ideas for More Peace. Come explore this story with 10 Smart Peaceful Ideas & Gifts to Give or Receive on Hello Lovely Studio.
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I’ll keep noticing the breath. Here is your reminder to check your breathing. If you’re holding your breath, notice. Gentle inhale, gentle exhale. Every morning will include spiritual practice. (If mornings are when you practice, we’ll be in a contemplative space together!) I’ll work on relinquishing the strong needs to be understood and to understand. Gurrrl, I need prayer to let them go!

FEMINIST quote from Elise Loehnen's ON OUR BEST BEHAVIOR: The Seven Deadly Sins and The Price Women Pay to Be Good.

I’ll write songs and sing to free my spirit. A volume of titles now! I’ll fully inhabit where I stand. I won’t rush the process, and I’ll rest.

Hello Lovely white Shaker kitchen with Viatera Minuet counters and polished venatino marble subway tile backsplash at farm sink.

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you and love to sprinkle seeds of faith and beauty here even when it all feels like a strange mystery.

Peace to you right where you are.

-michele

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White Slipcovered Sofa
SHOP MY HOME!
29″ Whitewashed Table Lamp Set of 2
LIVE BEAUTIFUL
SHOP MY BATH!
Trees White Wallpaper Mural
Round Farmhouse Table
Myla Slipcover Sofa
Deconstructed Wingback Bed (Hooker)
French Farmhouse Dining Table
Milagro Heart
Slipcovered Dining Chair
Rustic Farmhouse Counter Stool
Edgecombe End Table
Parisian Style Iron Table Lamp  33.5″
Black or Bronze Accent Table
French Stripe Basket Set
White Cotton Crochet Bed Skirt
French Country Rattan Basket Set
Marble Subway Mosaic Tile
Rattan Basket With Lid
White Ruffle Bedding
Seagrass Basket Set
Schumacher Wild Things Wallpaper
Slipcovered Sofa
Upholstered Dining Arm Chair
Shop My Breakfast Nook
White Matelasse Quilt
Tree Mural Wallpaper
Faux Potted French Lavender
Shaw Daybed
Distressed White French Country Chandelier
French Country Headboard
Oval Back Counter Stool, Set of 2
Antique Brass Pharmacy Floor Lamp
Round French Tufted Ottoman
Kinston Wood Bench
Italian Candelabra Chandelier
Slipcovered Linen Chair
Warner Upholstered Bench
Rustic Country French Dresser
Laurel Wreath Mirror
Round Farmhouse Dining Table
Reclaimed Wood Dresser
Louis Upholstered Bench
Pardon My French Doormat
Stripe Turkish Towel Throw
Pamela Arm Chair
Sweater Weave Basket
French Carved Wood Chandelier
Terracotta Pots & Basket
French Country Wood Chandelier
French Linen Dining Chair
Gustavian Cabinet
French Farmhouse Dining Table
Bar Stool
Beachy White Slipcovered Sofa
Rattan Armchair
Diptyque Oyedo Candle
Cross Back Dining Chair
French Country Candle Holder
French Industrial Metal Chairs (4)
Designer Favorite Wall Mirror
Holborn Lantern Pendant
French Country 6-Light Chandelier
Tray Side Table
French Country Upholstered Arm Chair
Wicker Trunk Set
French Ticking Stripe Pillow
Jute Area Rug
Mohair Throw
Rustic Industrial Farmhouse Shelves
Belgian Linen Sofa
White Duvet & Bedding
Rustic Wood Candlestick Set
French Market Basket
Linen Modern Wing Chair
French Country Farmhouse Baskets
Concrete Pillar Table Lamp
Boheme Madera Bench
Belgian Style Lamp
Kendall Skirted Dining Chair
White Charleston Sofa
Scrubbed Wood 5-Light Chandelier
Arched Champagne Wall Mirror
Moravian Star 1-Light Pendant
Highback Armchair
Mini Pendant Light
White Vase Set
Round Woven Placemat Set
Cashmere Throw With Fringe
Wreath Doormat
Fireclay Farm Sink (Reinhard, 30″)
White Waffle Coverlet
Light Grey Vienna Quilt
Boheme Madera Bench
Belgian Linen Duvet Set
Round Marble Side Table
Rustic Pedestal Farm Table
Rattan Hanging Chair Swing

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Let’s SHOP!

White Slipcovered Sofa
SHOP MY HOME!
29″ Whitewashed Table Lamp Set of 2
LIVE BEAUTIFUL
SHOP MY BATH!
Trees White Wallpaper Mural
Round Farmhouse Table
Myla Slipcover Sofa
Deconstructed Wingback Bed (Hooker)
French Farmhouse Dining Table
Milagro Heart
Slipcovered Dining Chair
Rustic Farmhouse Counter Stool
Edgecombe End Table
Parisian Style Iron Table Lamp  33.5″
Black or Bronze Accent Table
French Stripe Basket Set
White Cotton Crochet Bed Skirt
French Country Rattan Basket Set
Marble Subway Mosaic Tile
Rattan Basket With Lid
White Ruffle Bedding
Seagrass Basket Set
Schumacher Wild Things Wallpaper
Slipcovered Sofa
Upholstered Dining Arm Chair
Shop My Breakfast Nook
White Matelasse Quilt
Tree Mural Wallpaper
Faux Potted French Lavender
Shaw Daybed
Distressed White French Country Chandelier
French Country Headboard
Oval Back Counter Stool, Set of 2
Antique Brass Pharmacy Floor Lamp
Round French Tufted Ottoman
Kinston Wood Bench
Italian Candelabra Chandelier
Slipcovered Linen Chair
Warner Upholstered Bench
Rustic Country French Dresser
Laurel Wreath Mirror
Round Farmhouse Dining Table
Reclaimed Wood Dresser
Louis Upholstered Bench
Pardon My French Doormat
Stripe Turkish Towel Throw
Pamela Arm Chair
Sweater Weave Basket
French Carved Wood Chandelier
Terracotta Pots & Basket
French Country Wood Chandelier
French Linen Dining Chair
Gustavian Cabinet
French Farmhouse Dining Table
Bar Stool
Beachy White Slipcovered Sofa
Rattan Armchair
Diptyque Oyedo Candle
Cross Back Dining Chair
French Country Candle Holder
French Industrial Metal Chairs (4)
Designer Favorite Wall Mirror
Holborn Lantern Pendant
French Country 6-Light Chandelier
Tray Side Table
French Country Upholstered Arm Chair
Wicker Trunk Set
French Ticking Stripe Pillow
Jute Area Rug
Mohair Throw
Rustic Industrial Farmhouse Shelves
Belgian Linen Sofa
White Duvet & Bedding
Rustic Wood Candlestick Set
French Market Basket
Linen Modern Wing Chair
French Country Farmhouse Baskets
Concrete Pillar Table Lamp
Boheme Madera Bench
Belgian Style Lamp
Kendall Skirted Dining Chair
White Charleston Sofa
Scrubbed Wood 5-Light Chandelier
Arched Champagne Wall Mirror
Moravian Star 1-Light Pendant
Highback Armchair
Mini Pendant Light
White Vase Set
Round Woven Placemat Set
Cashmere Throw With Fringe
Wreath Doormat
Fireclay Farm Sink (Reinhard, 30″)
White Waffle Coverlet
Light Grey Vienna Quilt
Boheme Madera Bench
Belgian Linen Duvet Set
Round Marble Side Table
Rustic Pedestal Farm Table
Rattan Hanging Chair Swing